Contacts to a tourist
To come into "contact" with a western tourist woman is easy - it is sufficient, to just talk to a tourist.The easiest way is, of course, to obtain a job in the tourist industry, especially in the animation or restauration area in an hotel or in one of the typical tourists shops.
But even if such a position can not be obtained, the chances are quite good to attract the attention of a western woman on the street, in a shop, a taxi or a discotheque.
Recently, there are reports of increasing that the bezness man is keeping in the background and starts his approach close to the end of the holiday ("I watched oyu the whole time, but did not dare to talk to you").
Target groups of Bezness
TV documentation and press articles often give the impression that the target groups of Bezness are mainly naive, ignorant, unattractive women - but in reality, this is not true, not at all.True is rather, that the age or attractiveness of a woman has no relevance for the relationship, because the bezness man is primarily not even looking for personal advantages of a woman, but for the advantages that she can give to him. But, of course, he will prefer women who are, in addition, attractive (but not BECAUSE they are attractive).
Sentences like "I still look good for my age" or "others think I am younger", who are often used by olderly women are no more than self-illusions, because, like said above, the age or attractiveness make not difference for the bezness man.
The author spoke to more than one bezness man who had to beautify his girlfriend by first taking drugs or alcohole and even complained about it amongst his friends (however, there is the serious question here whether the drug or the unattractive woman was there first...)
Generally, bezness men have 3 target groups, in this order:
- single, young and well situated women
Exactly this is the ideal in the tunisian society as well. Marriages between a tunisian man and woman take place usually within the same age group (+- 2 years), and if one of them is considerably older (more than 10 years), then it is always the man, never the woman. And this is the reality, without exceptions.
- single elderly women
The age of a woman plays in a bezness relation, as described above, only a minor role. With older, single, women there is, however, a high chance of them being financially sound (and if it is even from the tunisian point of view) and craving for a young lover.
Once again, to make it really clear: A serious relationship between a tunisian man and a woman who is considerably older (10 years and more) is, in Tunisia absolutely unthinkeable and is rejected by the society - people laugh and make derogatory jokes about it.
A relationship to an older western woman is, in the opposite, valued positively by family and friends, only because it is absolutely clear for everyone that this is a bezness relation with great advantages for the man and it will be terminated sooner or later anyway.
- all other women
It even doesn't matter whether the woman is married or not. Bezness men often try to advance a woman even when her husband is sitting right next to her. The husband might even feel proud about it or does not take any serious notice - but a tunisian husband would not wait a second and sanction such an advance by adjusting the man's attitude right away and by whatever methods necessary. No wonder that western women are regarded by some tunisian men as fair game where anything goes - one only has to try.
Regarding divorced women, they are not the main prey for bezness men, however, they also are apparently wealthy (after all, they can afford to fly into an holiday) and may probably not rejecting the idea of a lover or potential stepfather for their child.
The objectives of a bezness man are, in this order:
- Visa to a western country
Not one for tuorists, but one to stay - which can be only obtained fast and easy by a marriage or fathering a child.
- Financial donations
These are all advantages, one can obtain - or, in other words, everything that comes money-free. Be it small sums of money or small gifts, be it big sums and gifts, everything is welcome and is being used by oneself or bartered or sold.
Tourists (in general) usually will not think about making a gift to someone that is, in their own eyes, inexpensive or invite someone to a meal or bar, after all, it is holiday time and one does not turn every penny, while others simply may feel sorry for a native of a poor country.
However, what is peanuts for tourists, can be quite an advantage for a tunisian earning just a few dinars, and, to gain this advantage, it makes sense for him to play responsive in a lot of ways or say exactly what the tourist wants to hear.
- Fun in bed
No explanation needed for that. However, contrary to what many people believe, it is not the case that men in Tunisia would not have the opportunity to get some from tunisian women.
The reality is rather, that Tunisia has a small area of official and a big area of inofficial locations and opportunities where a tunisian man can obtain "fun" easily and for small money (but not for free - see, that is the point...).
In line with these objectives, bezness men proceed with:
Strategy and Tactics
In many cases, there will be talks about a marriage soon, in many (but by far not in all!) cases, they will be demands for money or donations - outspoken or expected.If the Beznesser got a "victim", which has only little or no money, then it is also not a real problem for him, because every day, new tourists arrive at the airport.
However, they won't let go easily of what they have obtained, of course, and so they will continue to "work" the relation, even if it is a parallel second-, third- or fourth relationship, because even when it does not yield a marriage and a visa, there lures still the prospects of amoureuse and financial benefits, even of smaller nature - a the payment of taxi fares and some disco visits, for example. And - who knows, maybe one need only to give it some more time and it will turn out well anyway.
A typical characteristic of all such relationships is therefore, that they will never be abandoned or forgotten - even after months and sometimes years, they might decide to follow up on an "old" affair.
But as long as a relationship is still "hot" and are fresh, there will be fireworks of telephone and SMS contacts which effectively prevents the victim from looking at the relationship with some distance, not rarely alternating with deliberate time of no contact from the bezness man's side (who is then, from dubious reasons, "not reachable" for some period of time, so-called "carrot-and-stick-tactic").
In such relationships, the ultimate winner will often be the victim that manages it the fastest to marry and to present a visa to a western country, and, ideally, pay all the celebrations and ticket costs as well.
It is, as pointed out before nowadays, unlikely, that a Bezness man confronts a woman immediately with demands eg. for financial contributions - unless you meet someone who is "new" to the business, or has several relations going and is just up to exploite additional random "windfalls" as well.
But sooner or later, there will be, in almost all cases, open or hidden (expected) demands.
It usually starts with small things - talking about the own situation (no job, not well paid, etc.). Or they expect you to pay "small money" amounts (coffee, cigarettes, taxi) - and most Westerners will gladly do so, because, from their perspective, even paying for a visit to a discotheque or restaurant is quite inexpensive in Tunisia.
The next stage will be requests for small favors, such as bringing chocolate or alcohol, passing small amounts of money for charging the mobile phone and then it increases later to clothes, MP3 players, mobile phones or mobile computer (tablet, laptop, netbook) ... and, of course, only serious brand names, please.
Naturally, demands for "help" are not always openly expressed, but are instead wrapped in reports of dramatic personal situations in the hope that the western woman comes forward by herself and offers help.
They will then gladly accept the offered help, often after a while of grace (normally, I would never do it, but I have no choice right now) and often with the promise of repayment (which will never take place).
Tunisia - Land of Catastrophes
For an outsider, it seems that Tunisia is a country where every day all kinds of mishaps and disasters happen. And all of those can only be cured with money.A cell phone falls into the water and is unusable, the mother or the father or brother/sister suddenly need urgent medicine or medical treatment, police and city administration must be bribed, the employer demands reparation for a damaged part, things are stolen or lost, or a young man must free himself from tunisian military service, to name only the most common misadventures that seem to befall every Tunisian almost at weekly intervals.
While it needs to be admitted that Tunisia IS indeed a strange country where items have the tendency to get lost or damaged from freak situations (which I actually witnessed myself on multiple occasions), still 99% of all such claims are false and just brought up to pull money.
Exploiting Predicaments - Dilemmas
In many situations, affection and relations will be exploited without mercy, starting with communication (I have no money to call you, if we want to talk, you have to call me) and personal situations (I was laid off, I have no more money for rent and for food), to family matters (for the upcoming high holidays, we can not even buy a sheep that we have to slaughter).Not only is the western woman, who now "hangs on the fishing rod" already, tricked by challenging their pity - who does not want to talk to the boyfriend every few days, who will let him starve or spend a sad holiday - but also, the tourists profound ignorance of local habits and rules is being deliberately exploited.
In Tunisia, there is, for example, nobody who doesn't have a roof over his head, or a, whatever little, daily meal (in all cases, a tunisian family member will always jump in to provide the basics) and there are no religious rule that compulse one for rich meals at holidays (it is only "recommended" for those who can afford it).
Even the tunisian military, a 1 year compulsory time, from which every male Tunisians wants to become exempt, is largely in line with military services in western countries. For example, with the exception of the first few weeks after service starts, contacts to the "outside" are allowed and leaves for home are granted.
A "disappearance" for months and contact prohibitions are just fairy tales, which are told to western women in order to make them pay for the exempt from the tunisian military.
On the contrary - the military is a very good character-building time, which would certainly suit the majority of the Bezness men well!
Money and gifts
The fact that a large number of objects and even the money, that a Beznesser receives, will not end up in his pockets, is another matter.One should not be surprised that t-shirts, brand name jeans, or a mobile phone will end up with his brother, sister or a friend, because many Tunisians have a different approach to personal belongings and evaluate them first by use and exchange value, not by personal memory.
And, concerning money, it applies to many families, that anyone who just has some, will contribute it for common use. Things like "saving" or "personal use only" are widely unknown concepts in Tunisia, which has a culture where the group (family, tribe, friends) counts more than the individual.
If, for example, you leave any money "just for the case of an emergency" when you are going away, then you will always find, that, regardless of the elapsed time and left money amount, during your absence, an emergency has occurred and the money has been used up.
Continue:
Bezness Prevention